I've held a corporate job for nearly 6 months now and the biggest difference I can tell in my personal demeanor is that I am less ambitious than I was before. Which is sad. I feel defanged and robotic. It's a new environment for me and I took the job for the money. Which is also sad because I'm not someone who necessarily does things simply for money (money is very important I don't want anyone to think I'm adverse to the money grab. You have to do what you have to do sometimes). I feel like I haven't lived with force or with energy. That staring at a computer 8 hours a day has sapped me. I'm not a fan of this edition of me. I salivate at the thought of Friday and this nerve, this anxiety creeps into me around 7pm on Sunday night knowing I have to go back to the office the next day. I'm not an ingrate and I don't want to seem like I'm not grateful and appreciative to be employed. But there is a price to pay as well.
For some people, corporate life is right up there alley, more power to them. And to clarify, I don't hate my coworkers, superiors, anyone. It's just not an ideal fit . I get stir crazy after a while, restless. It's a learning lesson for sure . Whatever you do in life choose to live with force. Live. Don't exist. I know this is temporary so I'm not too worried but it is an eye opener.